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BogusławBierwiaczonek
L&OLWANTTOGETMARRIED
L&OLWANTTOHAVECHILDREN
ł
DOMAINOFBEHAVIOR:
L&OLAREOFTENINTIMATE6
L&OLOFTENHAVESEX7
L&OLCAREABOUTEACHOTHER
L&OLSPENDALOTOFTIMETOGETHER
L&OLTALKALOT
L&OLOFTENARGUE8
ł
PIVOT2:Weddingandafer
L&OLGETMARRIED
L&OLGOONHONEYMOON
L&OLSTARTLIVINGTOGETHER
STAGE3.Conjugallove
DOMAINOFEMOTIONS:
L&OLFEEL:(FOREGROUNDED):AFFECTION,ATTACHMENT,
RESPONSIBILITY,LIKING,KINDNESS,FRIENDSHIP
,
(BACKGROUNDED):INTEREST,SEXUALDESIRE,ADMIRA-
TION,SELF-SACRIFICE,RESPECT,DEVOTION,PLEASURE
ł
DOMAINOFPROPOSITIONALATTITUDES:
LTHINKSTHATTHEIRLLISGOOD
LTHINKSSlHECANCOUNTONOL
DOMAINOFVOLITIONS:
L&OLWANTTOLIVETOGETHER
L&OLWANTTORETAINTHEIRLL
L&OLWANTTOSHAREEACHOTHER)STHOUGHTSAND
PROBLEMS
ł
6Perhapsweshouldberemindedthat“intimacyisnotknowledge,orfamiliarity,orcomfort”or,
evenless,theexchangeofinformation,”thoughaprivatetalkmaybe.Teessenceofintimacyispri-
vacyaccompaniedbythe“breakdownofbarriersandindividualindependencethatismostcommonly
identifiedwithintensesexualecstasyandoblivion.CBeingintimate)isageneralizationofthatexperi-
ence,andsexualactivityisbutoneamongmanyactionsandactivitiesthatcontributetothatsenseof
Cunion)”(SOLOmOn,1990:247).Teseactivitiesincludebabytalk,cooing,kissing,holding,petting,etc.
7Asthemostconspicuousexpressionoflovingintimacyinourculture.
8TisparticularaspectofE-loversbehaviormayseemstrange,butmostpsychologists
(cf.SOLOmOn,1990;WOjciSzke,1993)claimthatthestrongertheLLis,themorelikelyitisthat
itwillbeaccompaniedbyfiercearguments.Linguistically,thisisborneoutbytheLOVEISWAR
metaphor(cf.LakOffandJOHnSOn;1980;KövecSeS,1986,1988).